Well, I’m in a pickle. When we moved out of our house last year, I had packed up all of my sewing stuff including all of my doll-making stuff. For an entire year while we were in temporary living quarters I didn’t sew any dolls and I thought that I really missed it. Turns out, I didn’t.
This past weekend I made two dolls for an auction basket for my aforementioned work event. I had decided that I was going to change up my doll pattern a little bit. So I worked up a new design: the dolls had skinnier legs and arms and a different backside. I changed up my pattern because how I was making them before wasn’t quick and it wasn’t always fun. I used to sew the dolls all together inside out, then flip them right-side out to stuff them and then I would sew up a little “zipper” in their back. Like this:
That gray seam up her back is a bunch of hand stitches of embroidery floss. I started to not like that process, because it was often difficult to stuff her arms and legs inside her body then sew around the seams then flip her back out. I started to not like that seam either … I didn’t like how it was so noticeable.
So, with my new pattern, I made the arms and legs thinner and decided I was going to machine sew the bottom of the dolls shut. I *hated* it. HATED IT. I was getting soooo angry while I was making the dolls then I was getting mad at myself for getting so angry then even madder at myself because I always told myself that once I didn’t like making the dolls, I had to stop. I realized I had reached that point. Sadly, my time away from the dolls didn’t make my heart grow fonder.
Here are the dolls that I made this weekend:
It’s supposed to be a boy and a girl but they don’t look all that different! I do like their arms and their legs, but their butts, I don’t like.
It wasn’t easier to stitch them up by their butts as I thought it was going to be. And I really don’t like how it looks – it looks unfinished. That picture makes it look nicer than it really looks in person.
See my dilemma? I dislike the back stitch look and I dislike the butt stitch look and I don’t care enough to try to work it out into a way that I DO like. I just need to BACK AWAY FROM THE DOLLS! I’m not 100% satisfied with my end product so I need to stop making them. My heart’s just not in it anymore.
This is our donation basket – it’s quite cute even if I am mad at my dolls. The monster dude is from my friend Abby.
So … ho hum. I’m bummed about it. It’s not that I’m sad about not making them anymore, that’s a bit of a relief. I’m just sad about losing interest. On the other hand, I started making the dolls because I made my first two for the girls when they were younger. They loved their dolls back then. Now that they’re older they’ve lost interest.
On a related note, I may close my Etsy shop. I’ve realized lately that I just don’t have the time to spare to keep it updated nor do I have the desire anymore. I haven’t made a decision about it either way … but the thought of closing it is niggling around in my brain and it won’t leave. I know I’ll come up with something else to make … I’m not going to stop making or sewing. I just don’t know if I’ll ever make large quantities of something again… I dislike feeling like an assembly line and that’s often how I felt when I was preparing for a craft show and making up 25 dolls to sell. And then the letdown and great disappointment of not selling my stuff is just too much. I haven’t had an Etsy sale in a long, long time and I’m indifferent about it, because I know I haven’t been marketing my shop. That doesn’t bother me much. But there’s been plenty of times when I’ve gotten excited about a new product or a craft show and I worked myself up in a tizzy creating and sewing stuff, only to be disappointed when nothing sold. I kinda just don’t want to play that game anymore.
Sad times. But, I know something new and exciting is around the corner. I just haven’t discovered it yet.